It's that time of year, where goals that were set in a fleeting moment of confidence are now wavering and being thrown out the window.
Research says that 70% of New Year's resolutions are broken by January 27th, with the remaining 30% being broken by February 1st. All the studies have shown that the primary reason once-optimistic goal-setters are falling drastically short of their plans is due to the fact that they are unrealistic, unobtainable, and humans naturally lack motivation and followthrough. But if you want to be the one unicorn to rise above the rhinos of the world, here's what you can do to prove the scientists and your mother-in-law wrong. Never again will she remind you that you do not meet her standards and you only weaseled your way into her family because you were the rebound.
Write down your resolutions.
It's not good enough to just shout into the void about how you want to improve yourself. By writing your goals on a piece of paper, you won't be able to change your goal halfway through January when you realize that you only want to lose 27 pounds because your neighbor, Amy, won't shut up about how great her new diet is and you want to lose weight faster than her and her fancy fad diet.
Tell a friend.
We can't make it through this life alone, and not just because playing on the see-saw requires another person. When it comes to achieving goals, it is vital to surround yourself with friends who can call you out on your lies and knows your weakest points so they can break you down if your ego climbs too high.
Share it on social media.
What's the best way to simultaneously reach your resolution and look like a better human than your friends? Share your journey on social media! Contrary to popular belief, social platforms are not there to strengthen relationships and maintain connections. The sole purpose is to give every Joe Shmoe a soapbox to stand on and shout out to the masses about how great of a person they are. So hop onto Twitter and Facebook and tell the world about your resolutions! Be sure to give constant updates, because this will boost your ego and put everyone else to shame. But don't say if you're falling short of your goals, because that is a real buzzkill. Instead, make everything sound like you're crushing your resolutions and that you have no faults or problems in your life.
Make a Pinterest board of motivational quotes.
Any successful person will tell you that they became who they are because of motivational quotes on Pinterest. Don't spend your time laying out reasonable steps towards your goals. Instead, spend countless hours scouring Pinterest for the PERFECT quotes that will motivate you and propel you forward.
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Partner with a weaker friend.
You need motivation to accomplish your resolutions. And the best way of finding motivation is by working alongside a friend who isn't as good as you and will make you feel better about yourself. So scroll through your contacts and identify which friendship you can exploit for personal gain. Now, it must be noted that you should give no indication that they are only in your life to be the lower score by which you compare your progress to. Instead, give some heartened spiel about how you want to reach your goals together, and how iron sharpens iron. But deep down, you know that if you are iron, they are the equivalent of Play-dough.
Set lower goals because you're destined to fall short of your own expectations.
Scientifically speaking, no one actually follows through with their New Year's resolutions. So save yourself some time and energy and just forgo the entire fad and relish in the fact that you're not lying to yourself, like your neighbor Amy is!
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